Previous Chapter | EMHS | Next Chapter
Chapter 303: I don’t deserve you
A child without a father.
As a result, such a small child has to learn to be strong, to constantly work hard, wanting to use his young and tender hands to protect his mother.
She didn’t think about it when the Miss was still around. But now her lady is missing, and that leaves this child to his lonesome.
Although there’s not the tiniest expression on the Little Master’s face-
Feng Haitang feels that in such a big room, the little figure seems so lonely and frail.
Making people wish they could bring him everything that’s best in the world.
Feng Haitang still wants to speak, but she’s interrupted by Yan Haotian, taking her away from the room.
The room is still dimly lit by the candle flame like before, and there’s the shadow of a frail child on the window’s paper screen, appearing so pitiful.
Feng Haitang can’t help but tighten her hold on Yan Haotian’s hand, quietly saying: “Haotian, it would be good if in the future, our children would be half as sensible and smart as the Little Master.”
Hearing those words, the light in Yan Haotian’s eyes suddenly dims down.
He stubbornly lets go of Feng Haitang’s hand, shaking his head at her. There’s a wooden expression on his face.
He turns around and walks away.
“Haotian!” Feng Haitang couldn’t bear it anymore, and she takes two or three steps to go in front of him. Her eyes are firmly fixed on him, and there’s a stubborn expression on her face. However, the rims of her eyes are slightly red, “Yan Haotian, until when do you want to keep on avoiding? Don’t you understand my intentions, don’t you believe me? The time that we’ve both wasted, isn’t it quite enough?”
She steps forward and grabs the man’s hand. At this moment, a deep and painful expression of attachment shows on her normally cool and elegant face: “Haotian, I’m begging you, don’t push me away anymore, and stop pretending that I’m invisible, okay?”
Yan Haotian closes his eyes.
He doesn’t dare look at her face.
This face is too young, too beautiful.
She deserves the best man, she deserves a better future.
Instead of-, instead of wasting time on him, an ugly man who’s already deformed, someone without a future.
Yan Haotian shrugs her hand off, he slowly motions what he wants to say.
“Don’t say this again, I don’t deserve you. It’s impossible for us.”
This sign language is something that he started learning after following Muyan.
He learned it very quickly, and it makes it very easy to communicate with the Miss, the Little Master, and the people of the Ink Camp.
Nowadays, even though he still couldn’t speak, he can live like an ordinary person.
However, this isn’t enough.
Now and in the future, he could no longer utter the name “Haitang”, he could no longer comfort her when she is sad, nor laugh with her when she is happy.
The way he is, how can he be worthy of the woman before his eyes?
“It’s not up to you to say whether you deserve me or not!”
Feng Haitang emotionally grabs him by the sleeves, and she can’t help but raise her voice, “You clearly like me, and I like you too, we are harmonious as a couple. The Miss and the Little Master, the people around us will all give us their blessings – so why? Why do you want to callously push me away?”
Yan Haotian’s hand shakes, but he soon signs a sentence once more, “You will find a man who is thousands times better than me.”
“But I don’t want any of those men, I only want you!” there’s a tremble in Feng Haitang’s voice, and she abruptly reaches out and hugs him tightly, “Yan Haotian, do you still not understand? I, Feng Haitang, will only love you in this life. In my eyes, no other man can compare to you!”
Yan Haotian’s body stiffens.
He uses all his strength to stop himself from taking her into his arms.
Haitang… Haitang… Haitang… why are you stubborn? Why are you so adamant?